Friday, March 25, 2005

[Edit: 1/4/05. I exchanged the Linksys WAG54G for new one, which is a Version 2 running Firmware version 1.00.19 (the previous one made no mention of which version it was, hence probably V.1 not V.2, and used different firmware). Other than the still slightly weak signal, I have not yet had any problems with it. If you have problems, take it back: in the EU it comes with a 3-year warranty].

Linksys LogoSo stats times once again.

But only because they are being very entertaining at the moment.
Anyone heard, or even heard of, the greys anatomy theme song? I'm quite surprised this turned up, as I wasn't aware I'd mentioned that book, even though I have an inherited 1901 version. But isn't it Gray? Well, it was for the 15th edition.

Anyone wondering what sort of mind searches for christine hamilton AND pvc?

Anyone wonder just what the following searcher was looking for? "white band" poverty france. Did they think the white bands were a French thing? Maybe they thought it was to stop poverty in France? Or are they looking for a supplier in France? All of which can probably be answered by suggesting that the searcher goes to the website, and if necessary asks questions there. Actually, does the campaign exist outside this country? If not, why not? (And argh! Tony Blair's been seen wearing one. Well, I suppose if he can't do anything else, he may as well give Oxfam a pound).

Anyone wondering if the following is a request or a metaphysical question? porn need man.

And of course the inevitable plethora of people searching for answers about the Linksys ADSL broadband modem-cum-router, or gateway as they call it, the wireless-G WAG54G.

Now let's look at the evidence. Google claims to find eleven and a half thousand sites which mention both WAG54G and the word "problem". One of the earliest results is a discussion forum with 65 long pages of complaints on the firmware alone (and this claims to be an Australia only site). The Linksys website has a press section apparently for the product. Trying to access it brings up a page labelled "Reviews and awards Australia" and one review in German, of a different product.

If I knew were the Cisco (the owners of Linksys) offices were, they would have been firebombed months ago. Admittedly all I'd need was a bit of petrol and a WAG54G Linksys Wireless-G ADSL Gateway left on long enough that the petrol ignites on contact.

Say it with me...
Linksys: Useless heap of shit. Ok so that Googlebombing campaign hasn't quite worked yet, as there is no sign of Linksys in the Google results, but this site handily comes fourth.

At the moment I'm trying to find a thermometer to see what temperature the thing runs at. The blurb claims it works between 0-40 degrees centigrade. So if the thing bakes itself beyond that... (all day it has been the only thing on in that room, and the central heating is not on, yet it's still very hot).

As for the claim it supports 32 separate wireless computers, I'd assume each takes it in turn to have a connection.

Number of times the router has had to be reset during the creation of this post: 21 (and much typing was done whilst there was no connection, hence it didn't have the option of falling over. I've not even attempted to quantify the time-outs, go-slows and numerous other issues).

And just as little experiment let's see how frequently WAG54G turns up in connection with other terms (all results in ghits, and a dash indicates that the total includes similar terms):
+ Problem: 11,500
+ Issue-: 1,215
+ Fault-: 1,122
+ Error-: 4,844
+ Useless: 854
+ No use: 71
+ Crap: 379
+ Trash: 265
+ Rubbish: 117
+ Garbage: 346
+ Junk: 133
+ Shit: 176
+ Shite: 23
+ Bollocks: 20 (not as in dog's)
+ Bad: 508
+ Poor: 664
+ Dire: 3,460*
+ Fail-: 1,214
+ Failure-: 1,176
+ Dreadful: 10
+ Awful: 99
+ Dismal: 5
+ Abysmal: 9
+ Horrendous: 8
+ Horrible: 133
+ Pathetic: 61
+ Disappoint-: 208
+ Dismay-: 14
+ Shambles: 5
+ Shame-: 192
+ Ashamed: 31
+ Unhappy: 132
+ Sad: 554
+ Upset: 22
+ Miserable: 47
+ Defect-: 219
+ Flaw: 54
+ Trouble-: 1,428

* Many of which are the French word dire meaning to talk, although several of those feature ne, rein or pas.

For comparison (bear in mind sites selling it have to write good things to sell it):
+ Good: 910
+ Happy: 1,410
+ Useful: 6,480
And of the top five for useful, the first features a list of 11 reviews of which two are positive; the second is an inaccessible database, although useful is not featured in the excerpt cited by Google; the third is the 65 pages of Australian complaints; the useful mentioned in the fourth is in "Useful Links"; and the fifth talks of converting the firmware to something more useful. Conclusions?

Happy seems to have similar amounts of negatives or sarcasm.

It sounds like Linksys have managed to unite the world in one common voice with their little blue bundle of joy.


PS. Any suggestions for more negative words to check WAG54G perception?

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