Monday, January 22, 2007

CF7 600 - Ultracolour - 15 Teapot Pepperpot"Wonderfully expansive all-encompassing"

Oh dear, that's starting to sound like MQ's Flickr testymoanial (yes, I know I haven't reciprocated, but that's because I suspect he'll find more backhanded insults and sarcasm than I put into it. Oh, and Martin, yes, I did notice [well, I am me] but thought you'd only use any comment on it to prove your point. And in the spirit of explaining jokes, you got the Much Ado ref, did you not?). The quote above comes from Mr/Uncle Ben over at the suspiciously orange (how dare he use the same basic Blogger template as me) The lunatics are running the asylum, otherwise known as he who is apparently afflicted with hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophilia (from horse river monster half and pedalo love [ok, so perhaps the pedalo might be supposed to be foot, and so referring to words, or possibly hippopotamuses, a foot and a half long]). Unfair? Well, his email address starts with tempestuousness and his blog's URL is based on vicariosity, which I've just realised could be even longer by being vicariousness.

And how dense must I be not to connect vicar with vicarious? Both being based upon substitutions. Perhaps the vicker (or possibly vickr; which reminds me, is Flickr's studious lower-case-ness anything to do with a cartoon FLICK?) pronunciation hasn't helped.

So Ben has been lurking around for a while (remind me to sidebar him at some point), after I rejuvenated a game on his blog by not reading the date (go and play; it's fun), having found him through a comment on AA. I know remarkably little about him, other than he claims to live in Bath, injures himself regularly, likes Monty Python and checks this blog from work. And that's about it, except for a little bit of being nosey, and so narrowing his surname down to one of three, and then trying to match a bruised eyebrow with an image gleaned from a profile page, assuming Ben is actually his name. Admittedly all of this doesn't help me answer the most important question of all: does he speak Zummerzet?

But don't worry, Ben, it's for no reason other than ideal curiosity* and of no more use to me than Ryan's parents' phone number (I didn't mean to, it just sort of fell out of the internet).

* I'm really not with it today. That of course should read "idle curiosity". So what is ideal curiosity? Enough to find out the answers while not enough to get one killed if one happens to be a cat?

Words I accidentally inverted, er, I wasn't even trying, sorry, that should read invented, during writing this post:
Temptestuousness: Tendency to sudden violence caused by a very nice looking piece of fudge.
Vicuriosity: Either a vicar considering administering both Catholic and Anglican services, or someone with an innate inquisitiveness about all things episcopal (as Aspergerish as that may sound).
Testymoanial: Praise delivered in an irritated and berating way.

Hmm, I seem to be even more synapsy than usual.

Yes, that was yet another neologism.
Synapsy: To function as a synapse and so make repeated rapid connections between disparate objects.

That better be it before I coin any more (why is it "to coin a phrase" not "to mint a phrase"?).


Hello. And I thought so hard before arriving at "wonderfully expansive all-encompassing"...

I imagine I would be more disturbed by you giving me the Jim Rockford treatment if it wasn't the sort of thing I have done myself on occasion. By the way, Idle curiosity is surely an extension of liking Monty Python?

I have a number of specific comments and responses:

i) For interest, until a fortnight ago my weblog was named 'vicariousness' as opposed to TLARTA.

ii) I am not a vicar.

iii) I am fond of hippos.

iv) Sidebar me!

v) Yes, you are very synapsy indeed. Synapsical, even.

vi) I am not blessed with a Somerset accent, despite never having left the county*.

*Not true.
Would you prefer the Rockford treatment or the Columbo treatment (complete with eye)?

As for Idle curiosity, I think I'm more a Chapman [nudge, nudge, wink, wink, say no more; I don't believe I just did that].

i) Thought it was but then thought I'd dreamed it.

ii) You sure? Have you ever considered being one?

iii) And are they fond of you?

iv) Jawohl mein Herr. 'Cept it always crashes when I try changing the template. I will, at some point. What more do you want?
Benjamin, Benjamin, never before has a boy asked for more
[but maybe I've just been doing it wrong]

v) Thanks, I think.

vi) So you were actually saying "You are blessed with a Somerset accent despite never having left the county"?
As televisual experiences I am hard pressed to choose between The Rockford Files, Columbo and Cagney and Lacey. If pressed, Falk edges it, although his show lacks a catchy theme tune.

Chapman eh? I'm more of a Palin man myself. He's so much more...alive.

ii) Yes I'm sure. They don't even tend to get a house thrown in with the job these days, and fervent atheism is normally considered inconsistent with holding such a post.

iii) The last one I encountered seemed at best indifferent towards me.

iv) I'm not sure the Mr Bumble act suits you. Any advance on three pounds ten, then?

vi) Deliberate ambiguity on my part. Technically I did not live in Somerset until the abolition of Avon in 1996. Either way, I do not possess a west country accent.
ii) I thought at least a modicum of doubt was a requirement for the job; surely outright disbelief just means you fulfil aspects of the "preferable" section as well.

iii) I have some fascinating pictures of some knobby bits on the far horizon of a flooded lake, so I think they prefer you.

iv) What makes you think it's an act? Blogger does tend to fail to complete whenever I change the template.

vi) Avon's gone? So what accent do you have?
ii) The pay is lousy too.

iv) 'Mr Bumble' referred your almostquote from 'Oliver!' rather than to any inability to update your blog template. I don't doubt that Blogger is being difficult.

vi) Miscellaneous South of England. You?
iv) Oh. Bloody Dickensian determinative nominalism* or whatever it's called.

vi) Thereabouts. It wanders depending who I'm speaking to (or with whom I am speaking), though usually it unintentionally drifts away from their accent.

* Or possibly nominative determinism, or an aptonym or aptronym.
iv) Quite. Sidebarring noted with thanks, even though it does make me sound like a vicar.
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