Anyhoo (yes "anyway" was already taken).

Geitjie

Any guesses?

Ok, so ignore what it means and just stick with how to say it.

Well?

Guh-ite-jee?

Except ji=y in Dutch en Afrikaans*. So that makes:

Guh-ite-y

Unless the first couple of vowels are one syllable, which would make it:

Guyt-y or Gayt-y

Which is almost there. Except the consonants are wrong. Because in this case g=h (well, I think it's a -gh or -ch as in loch or Cruquiusweg), but I can only hear the aitch.

Oh, and t=k as in what is this, I don't even.

Yep, dat woord op die top is pronounced something along the lines of "hike-y".

Seriously, hiké?

You learn something new every day. Not all of it encouraging, my little treasure balls.

It's probably best not to ask why someone called me a geitjie-kind (and thank God they didn't call me "boy" instead of "child").

And the next time some American complains about "Britisher" spelling I shall refer them to Dutch (or Afrikaans).

The other options for lizard according to Google are: akkedis, hagedis & koggelmander.

The first two are the same word. Hark-at-this.

So g is h except when it's k. And the vowels are sometimes h too. And t is sometimes k. And ji is sometimes y, sometimes é and sometimes silent (the reason boy/seuntjie/zirnk would have made me cry).

Anyhoo,

* Turns out I was thinking of ij. Still reasonable to think -jie is -gee or -ee or -eye.

Was about to be publicly indignant about fudge.

Bought some "Devonshire Made Confectionery Home Made Home Made Clotted Cream Fudge" from a shop in Croyde. Got home, which is very not Croyde, to find the best before date is apparently a week before I bought. Cue mentally composing witty but derisive tweet about buying food from somewhere called The Old Cream Shop/in a package that makes use of Comic Sans. While typing that date into Twitter thought that 17/7/11 looks a bit palindromic if you're a bit dysexic [typo, but, er, moving swiftly on] and wondering why I hadn't noticed earlier, and then went to check the address of the makers and the ingredients for further mocking material, when I happened to notice the reason for the not originally spotting the palindromedary.

I'm not sure whether I'm happier to know that the fudge isn't a bit stale because it will remain incorruptible for an entire year. Turns out it uses palm oil instead of butter, hence the not-going-off-ness.

Note to self: in future, when a package talks about the product "using a traditional family recipe handed down through the years" remember that two is plural.

And this is the view where it is made.

Um, yeah, so I think the best thing to come out of the Teignmouth probably still is Muse.

Anyway, Croyde fun. Didn't surf. Didn't swim. Stood taking pictures of patterns in the waves around my feet and climbing hills because they were there.

Anyhoo,

It is good sign if you nearly tell the "baby milk" beggar (and possible crack addict) that she's looking well today?

Because she was. Although I'm surprised her baby's not on solids yet, given how long she's been jumping in front of strangers and telling them she needs £2.49 to buy baby milk. Unless of course she's had another baby, but if so then she's shifted the baby-weight remarkably well, although she can't have put much on because I don't remember her showing. I am a bit surprised the price of the formula hasn't gone up, but maybe they've just shrunk the tins a bit, or she's switched brands.

As I made my excuses and left she shouted after me "I like your hairstyle. Where you from? Israel?"

Answer came there none because, well, where does one start?

It was almost as good as being asked while on the stall selling myownwork, which tends to be a bit light on people, and which tends to be taken by me, a child of the eighties, if I had anything of The Beatles.

1. I probably wasn't capable of operating a camera when the first of them died (but I'd have probably be able to chew gum the strap).
2. While there is a slight overlap between all four being extant and me being likewise, they had been disbanded for some while by this stage.
3. Just generally, what the hell are you on? Baby formula?
4. Seriously, you think I look old enough to have seen The Beatles live? I'll have you know that someone earlier in the day assumed I was 19 or 20; people often assume I was born after Back to the Future. I think they mistake ineptitude for inexperience.
5. Unless they're shiny I probably won't have taken a photograph of them anyway. Also they're people, and they move, and those of you with Facebook or Google+ access will know I'm not all that great with moving subjects.

Anyhoo,